Archive for May, 2008

Getting emotional

When I was in grade one or two, kids made fun of my laugh. I was also informed by several adults that “big boys don’t cry”. So I did my best to stop laughing or crying. By about grade eight, I decided that I needed to do something about this. I was tired of bottling myself up out of fear of ridicule and rejection. I had few friends. I was small, scrawny, and stubbornly liked what I wanted to like. I had no desire to be cool or popular, yet I was still letting others control how I would or would not express myself. It was time for a change. When I started high school, I decided to also start expressing emotions.

Now, you can’t control what emotions you feel, (more…)


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So, to what extent am I sexist? It is hard for me to say for certain. I expect that I have blind spots in this area keeping me from knowing for certain. Yes, I have links to Feminist groups in my blogroll, but that doesn’t mean I’m feminist, so much as that I enjoy reading interesting articles by intelligent people.

I have often adopted the awkward grammatical structures of how God reveals God’s self and God’s purpose or how one might reveal what they think by how they act, in the attempt to avoid gendered pronouns. But when I want to make sure I am clearly getting my point across, or just get sick and tired of the grammatical circumlocutions, God becomes He, and our random example of a hypothetical person becomes a man. I’ve preached sermons on God’s lack of a gender, and on the male and female images of God in the Bible (these sermons raised more controversy than any other), but I’ve refused to change the words to the Lord’s prayer to gender-neutral.

I told my wife that I’d like if she took my name when we got married, but that it was her choice. I had no intention, however, to change my own. I’m not saying she couldn’t have persuaded me, but that I would have had to be persuaded. She has hyphenated her last name.

I knew I had these issues. I don’t apologize.

When I read articles like the one on Feministing about a NYT write-up on summer dresses, though, I think about attitudes I have and actions I perform that perhaps I should apologize for. Maybe. I’m not positive. (more…)

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While I was reading this article over on Skepchick and the ones that it linked to, and the ones linked to in the comments, and the ones that they linked to, I had a lot more thoughts than I shared in my last post. I chose not to write it all out as one ginormous article- for your sakes and mine- and wasn’t sure if I was going to add my other thoughts.

But it looks like I will.

As I was reading about racism, sexism and privilege, I reflected on some of the privilege I have, but hadn’t realized was privilege, as well as on my own sexism (a later article, perhaps), and some of the ways in which I am a racist.

It’s not something I like about me, but (more…)

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I was looking at the Skepchick blog, particularly at this post about feminism, racism and skepticism. I followed some of the links in that post (and the comments to that post) to other sites, where I found other links to other sites. Basically, I ended up spending a few hours reading about feminism, racism, and privilege. As I read, I recognized some parts of myself that I don’t particularly like. I also faced the question of whether I am actually going to change.

When I created this blog, I hesitated in calling it One Man’s Journey. I like the anonymity of the Internet. I don’t often refer to my own gender, race or age. I don’t say what country I’m from (more…)

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Wikipedia defines a coincidence as “the noteworthy alignment of two or more events or circumstances without obvious causal connection”. Sometimes, when faced with a coincidence, we may see a causal connection that is not actually there. Yesterday, I spent four hours cleaning my car- inside and out. Just as I was finishing and putting the floormats back inside the car, it began to rain. I could get the impression that washing my car caused it to rain (especially if it happened often, or I never listened to weather reports). I could further claim that scheduling picnics also causes it to rain, being in a hurry causes the photocopier to jam, and stepping into the shower causes the phone to ring. Instead, I see these things as events that coincide in time but are unrelated by any causal connection (one did not cause the other, nor were both caused by the same thing).

There is a tendency, in some Christian circles to look at coincidences and call them God-incidences, (more…)

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